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Conquer Performance Anxiety with EFT

How to best describe matrix reimprinting? Through a story … I was working with a client on limiting beliefs. A discovery session revealed that she held a particular (and not uncommon) belief that she was not good enough, that somehow she was ‘less than.’ This belief was getting in the way, particularly around starting and developing her new business. Although she had a robust product and detailed business plan, she was hesitant to market and promote herself. She felt stuck, like an imposter, like she couldn’t move forward. When I asked her what this belief might be linked to, she recalled a memory from when she was 6 years old. Because there was no real emotional charge in this memory, she was skeptical that there would be anything relevant, but it was the earliest memory that she could readily bring to mind. Going back into that memory, she described a time when she was six years old. She was able to picture a scene on the playground at school. There were a number of kids there, and one of the boys announced to the group that another girl (my client's best friend) was his first girlfriend and that she (my client) was his second girlfriend. We paused and froze the scene so that my client could approach her younger self. She told me that in that moment, her younger self wasn’t particularly emotional but just that she was aware that she was second in the ‘pecking order’ and that perhaps she wasn’t good enough to be chosen as the number one choice. After all, her best friend was pretty, fun, and friendly. My client imagined tapping on her younger self to acknowledge that she realized how her younger self was feeling at the time and to give her reassurance that an older version was there to help. When asked what that younger version of my client needed, she said that she just wanted to go play with her best friend. My client imagined this happening - she imagined her younger self and her best friend leaving the scene and playing. When checking in again with her younger self, she said she wanted to be reminded about how people make choices. In conversation with her younger self, my client used the analogy of cookies, saying ‘a chocolate chip cookie is not better than a peanut butter cookie but some people prefer one over the other. Both cookies are equally delicious’. When the younger version of my client heard this, she said that she wanted to imagine herself and her best friend feeling and showing love to themselves. My client was able to envision two little girls having fun, saying ‘I love ME’ and ‘I love YOU’ as they giggled, hugged, and played … Those little girls had been given the gift of self-love in that memory, knowing that self-love is the most precious gift that anyone can give themselves. As the session ended, I noticed tears rolling down my client's face. She was amazed at the depth of learning from this memory, and she was able to see how this younger version of herself made conclusions that helped to form the basis of her limiting belief. With the wisdom and insight of perspective, her younger self was able to realize the most important lesson of this moment. It was not about not being chosen first. It was about choosing to be loving, carefree, and joyful in the moment. My client left the session feeling confident, strong, and proud, agreeing to take steps to bravely take steps to promote herself and her business. This learning and these shifts are profound and transformative and they create the basis for empowered change.

Many women, like my client Katie, develop a birth plan that outlines their hopes and dreams for their perfect birth experience. Often this serves as a guide to a birth that is completely aligned with their hopes and dreams. Sometimes, however, things do not go to plan, which can result in sadness, disappointment and self-doubt. Despite her plan for a calm and peaceful home birth, Katie had a difficult and traumatic birth experience which resulted in an emergency C-section. Her son was healthy, but the birth was chaotic and frightening, and Katie ended up feeling that somehow she failed, that her body failed, and that she did not give her first baby the birth that he deserved. I met Katie about 8 weeks before she was due to have her second baby. She reported that she has flashbacks to her previous experience and thus finds herself with feelings of anxiety around the upcoming birth. Additionally she feels a sense of guilt about having a C-section. As with many women, she is her own worst critic and in th